Author’s Note: No strong language or adult situations?? Wow! ;P Consider this chapter a cute one
Noah’s Point of View
Boy let me tell you, bringing another baby into my life wasn’t easy! It started off with her just being extremely afraid of me; she never wanted me to touch her or even go near her! Then it progressed to her being a bit of a brat. She wouldn’t listen to anything I said; she felt that everything she did was the right thing to do. I’d put her in her bed, she’d scream and get out of it. I’d say eat your dinner, she’d throw it at Ryder and tell me no! I never once got too angry at her though because of what she went through. I’m not saying I didn’t put in her time-out, just that I tried to see it from her little point of view. I believe going from some maniac chick to being thrown in with me and Ryder was a HUGE change for her. She was just trying to figure everything out- Which is hard for a 3 year old to do!
Sam came busting through the door, “Where horsie?!” She demanded!
Oh god… here we go.
I just don’t need her little attitude right now. Ryder has had the flu for the past 2 days and it’s been a nightmare trying to get him to settle down every night- He gets very clingy when he’s sick. I put her in her room over an hour ago – since she wasn’t listening to me – and I took her horse away and hid it in Ryder’s toy-box. I guess she finally figured out the door knob to get out of her room…
Ryder clung to my shoulder, his eyes were heavy and he kept moaning every few minutes. I just wish this stupid fever would go away!
“Samantha Terrey.” I raised my voice to her, “What do you think you’re doing?? I said for you to wait in your room until I was done with your brother didn’t I?”
“HORSE!” she shouted and then stomped her foot.
I glared at her, “Samantha you’re not getting that horse! You weren’t listening to daddy, so you don’t get the toy. Go back to your room right now.”
She glared back and then reached into the toy-box. She smiled up at me and then ran out of Ryder’s room.
I REALLY have to find a new hiding spot for her toys when she is bad. She didn’t even have to look for it; she knew right where the dang horse was!
It’s not even like I could chase after her because Ryder was resting in my arms. I had to stay with him in his room for another half hour while I tried to get him to go to sleep. I knew Sam wasn’t doing anything other than making a mess, she can’t get out of the apartment (I have the doors locked) so I wasn’t worried about my little brat.
When I knew Ry was asleep for sure, I gently placed his little self into his crib. He was so drained he didn’t even bother to make a fuss about it. My poor little guy…
I kissed his forehead, “I hope you get better soon, pal. You really have daddy worried.” I whispered.
After placing Ryder down, I went to go look for my daughter. I tried my room first because she has a habit of going in there and pulling out my dresser drawers. She thinks she’s so cute when she puts on all my clothes… well okay, it’s adorable, but I won’t encourage her! She needs to know that making messes is bad.
I stepped foot into my living room and looked around. It was like a baby nuclear bomb went off in here. I really need to find time to straighten this place up. It’s just hard though! I work, plus even when I clean it Sam and Ryder go right behind me and make more messes! I can’t win.
Sam giggled, “Hi daddy! Play with me!”
I sighed, “Sam this is not the time to play. It’s time for bed, so get your butt in your room.”
As soon as I said that, the water works started. She hated being put to bed. She always gives me such a hard time EVERY night with it. I wish just once she would agree with me and go to bed- In HER bed. I never told anyone this, but ever since Sam has been with me she hasn’t slept in her own bed once. She sleeps next to me every night because she screams at the top of her lungs if I leave her alone in her room. I thought it was because she was afraid of the dark, so I bought her a night-light. That did no justice, she still screamed. Don’t get me wrong though, it’s not like I don’t try to put her in her own bed, because I try EVERY night.
“NO DADDY! NO!” she cried out, dropping the horse from her hands.
I knew she wasn’t going to go willingly, so I marched over to her and picked her up off the floor. She didn’t make that easy on me either. She’d kick, scream, and punch me, making it almost impossible to carry her.
She pulled out of my grasp, “NOOOO! NO! NO! Daddy no!” She screamed.
I sighed loudly, picking her up, “You don’t tell daddy no!” I growled, “Now come on, time for bed!”
I whisked her away to her room and quickly changed her into something more comfortable. I love my little girl so much, but I’m only human, there is only so much I can take with her before I start to get a little loud. She’s like this with me every single day, so it’s pretty tiresome.
I placed her in her crib, “Alright sweetie, I love you. Sleep tight.”
She reached up to me, “Please daddy no leave me.”
God, it’s so heart breaking! Every time she does that I just want to squeeze her tight and let her know that I’m never going to leave her.
I just ignored what she had said and just turned away from her. I can’t keep looking into her teary little eyes; I’m going to cave again!
“You can do this Noah, just don’t look at her.” I said out loud.
She sniffled, “Daddy? Daddy pwease?”
Alright, so I caved. I just can’t take all those little heart breaking things she says. Every time she tells me not to leave her, I keep thinking about what Stacey put her through. How many times was she abandoned to be alone in a room by herself? I just can’t imagine what she did to my little princess. Plus it’s funny, you’d think I’d wake up with her snuggled against me… but usually it’s me against her. What? I get lonely…
It had been quite a bit of years now since everything had happened. My life got on a solid routine that I feel pretty comfortable with. It’s not always easy being a single parent, but I learned to adapt to it the best way that I could. My kids may be much rougher than a kid who was a raised by only his mother, but I don’t know how to be gentle and sweet like Riley. I only know how to be a dude. So, I do the best that I can. Plus I can’t go by experience of my own mother; she wasn’t like most moms… that’s for sure.
“DADDY! I WANT OUT!” Ryder screamed.
“Alright, Ryder. Chill.” I sighed coming into his room.
Just as I was about to get Ryder out of his crib, Sam came busting through the door.
“Daddy, when are they going to get here??” she questioned, “It’s been forever!”
Before I had a chance to reply, Ryder screeched, “Get here! Daddy when get here?”
Ryder had a habit of copying everything people said, even if he didn’t understand it himself. I found it kind of cute but it annoyed the crap out of Samantha.
“Stop copying me drooly!” she demanded, “Daaaadddddyyyyy! You said they would be here like 100 years ago!!”
I sighed, “They’re just running late, sweetie. You got to remember to give old people a chance.”
She laughed, running out of the room, “I’m telling grandpa and grandma you called them old!!”
She’s such a little tattle tale…
Before I had the chance to go wrestle my daughter into silence, the door-bell rang. Samantha ran away from me and flung open the door. Before anyone had a chance to say anything Samantha just had to tell them what I had said.
“Grandma, grandpa, daddy said you guys were late ‘cause you’re old! You should beat him up!” she laughed, before running off to her room.
My dad just smiled at me, “Oh so we’re old now is that it?”
I just smirked, “You know I love you guys, heheh.”
“MOM!” my little brother shouted, “How long do we have to stay here? I want to go to the park!”
My mom cast him a glare, “We’re visiting your brother and sister today! You haven’t seen them in a while- Stop complaining.”
Nothing like being around family…
(Parker’s traits are Grumpy, Rebellious and loves the outdoors. Samantha’s traits are Over-emotional, Friendly and Virtuoso. Ryder’s traits are Neurotic and Easily Impressed- Ry has two of my simselfs traits… lol)
As soon as I let them in they didn’t even ask the normal “How are you?” type questions, they got straight into a topic. See most people who haven’t seen each other in years would be awkward around one another; nope, not my parents. It never worked that with them- It’s like I just seen them yesterday!
My mom shoved a picture at me, “This is Nix’ son, Daniel! He finally found him in some abandoned work-house in Egypt; can you believe it? Your father and I were just so happy to get this picture in the mail! It’s such a relief to know that our little grandbaby is safe after all these years.”
Dad rolled his eyes, “Yeah and not only that Ana gave us a letter about how she just got pregnant. I don’t want my little girl pregnant!” he growled, crossing his arms.
Mom patted him on the shoulder, “It’s okay you big baby… let her grow up!”
Dad and mom were in the middle of arguing over letting my sister grow up or not when my brother Parker came over to me.
“You got any toys??” he questioned.
I smiled down at him, “Uh, yeah little bro. Just go down the hall and make left. Samantha is in her room and I’m sure she’ll be happy to share with you.”
“EW!” he exclaimed, “I don’t want to play with girly toys!!”
I sighed, “Well… I have this spring toy in there that belongs to Ryder. You can play with-“
“-TH-THAT!” I groaned as he ran across my foot. Wow, what the heck is wrong with that brat?! He doesn’t have any freaking manners! I know my parents would have never let me do that kind of stuff! My dad would have grounded me until I died and my mom would remind everyday about it!
My dad hung his head, “Sorry about that.”
I just rolled my eyes and followed after Parker. I wanted to make sure Samantha would be okay with that brat playing in her room. God, now I remember why I picked on my little brother and sisters.
I poked my head inside her room and looked over at the kids. Sam was sitting quietly on her pancake chair watching Parker play wildly on her brother’s spring toy.
“You alright in here, sweet pea?” I asked Samantha.
She rolled her eyes at Parker and then nodded her head.
“WHOO!!! No one can stop the king of all the pirate ships!”
“It’s a captain of the ship.” she stated, “Plus slow down before you break my little brother’s toy.”
“Never!” he laughed.
I walked back into the living room and found my parents just sitting on the couch watching Ryder play.
“Well the kids are alright… I guess.” I sighed, “Are you guys okay?
My mom looked up at me, “Yeah we’re fine. We’re just watching Ryder play. He’s such a good baby Noah, you’re doing a great job with him- Sam too, she’s a great girl.”
My dad nodded, “Yeah, we’re proud of you Noah.”
Okay… what’s going on?
I sat down next to them, “Alright, seriously guys… I know you wanted to visit me, but what’s with the sad tones? Are you guys SURE you’re alright?”
“Well…” My dad started.
My mom cast him a glare, “Jed, don’t you even.”
“No, I am!” he looked over at me, “We just, well we… we kind of feel bad for you is all.”
I cast him a puzzled look, “What for?”
“Well, we just feel bad because you’re doing this all alone. You’re raising two kids with no one to help you, plus you only just lost Riley 3 years ago. We were getting really worried about you. Phea and Luke are back together and are expecting another baby, Qiana is pregnant and with someone, Nix found his son and is dating a nice girl…we just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
I chuckled, “Guys, I’m doing fine! You don’t have to worry about me. Yeah, it gets really freaking hard to take care of these two at times, but I’m managing. I’ll admit it’s hard not having Riley around, I mean REALLY hard. There isn’t one day that goes by that I don’t miss her or think about how things could be different with her here.”
My mom sighed, “We know that Noah, that’s why we had to come check up on you. We miss having you around and seeing your goofy self-get into trouble. It’s never easy watching your babies grow up and leave you. It’s even harder to be so far away and worry every day if they are alright.”
I stared down at Ryder and sighed, “I know you miss me and I know you worry about me, but I’m going to be alright. I know what you guys are trying to hint towards, but I’m sorry, I just can’t stop loving Riley. So to answer what you’re probably thinking is no, I’m not going to try to ever see anyone else. I don’t want anyone else. I’ve been taking care of Sam and Ryder by myself this far and I’m going to keep doing it for the rest of my life. Riley was the only mother they would ever need, since she is not here, well… they got me.”
My dad rested his hand on my shoulder, “Son, I know this may be a tough truth to face, but eventually you’re going to have to learn to let go of Riley. What would she think if you were to hold onto her forever and miss opportunities to find someone to love again? You’re 27; take after my good looks, and my charm. What lady wouldn’t want you?”
“Dad it’s not like I haven’t gotten offers, because I have. It’s just that I don’t feel like I could ever love someone as much as I love her- She meant everything to me.”
He sighed, “Well just know this Noah, when you’re ready to take off that wedding ring… we’ll be here to support you. We love you son.”
I looked down at my ring and moved it around, “Yeah I know you guys do. You always have looked out for my best interest. If I ever do feel like I’m ready, you’ll be the first to know.” I smiled.
Just as we were in the middle of our conversation Sam came running down the hallway with tears in her eyes. All 3 of us jumped up and looked at her.
“What happened?!” my mom gasped.
“P-p-parker punched me and said that I’m stupid because my mommy is DEAD!” she cried out.
My heart felt like it stopped when she said those last words. What the- Why did he say that to her!?
My parents glanced at each other, “Do you have this one?” my dad asked.
My mom’s eyes narrowed, “OH yeah…” She stated, marching down the hallway.
I watched my mom storm off before I went over to Sam to perform my fatherly duty of cheering her up.
“Sam, hey, look at me.” I said, crouching down to her. She wiped her tears and sniffled, “You are not stupid, don’t listen to Parker. He’s just being a punk.”
She looked at me, “B-but m-my mommy is dead! So-So-So…”
“Hey, I don’t want to hear any of that.” I sighed, wiping her cheeks, “Just because mommy passed away, it doesn’t mean that you’re stupid. It had nothing to do with you Samantha, you hear me? Mommy loved you very much and thought you were the prettiest girl alive. Alright?”
She nodded her head before grabbing me in a hug, “I l-love you daddy.”
My dad just couldn’t help but give me an “Awwww! How shweet!” I just rolled my eyes at him and picked my baby girl into my arms and brought her over to the couch to watch some cartoons. Yeah I know I’m not telling her the entire truth about her “real” mother, but I swear to god if Riley was alive she would have loved Samantha so much. So really, I’m not lying. Plus come on, how can I tell a 5-year-old that her mother is in prison for life for murder and kidnapping!? It’s a miracle she doesn’t remember her.
As we sat on the couch I could hear my mother screaming at the top of her lungs to my brother. Good, because that’s what he deserves for saying something so cruel to his niece!!
“What is WRONG with you?! How DARE you say something like that to Samantha! Plus you hit her?? Oh you’re not going to the park for a long time Parker!!” she raged.
“MOM!” Parker screamed back, “That’s not fair!! She deserved it! She kept telling me to get out of her room and-and…”
“NO, I don’t want to hear it Parker! You’re grounded for 3 weeks. No games, no toys, and no PARK!”
“FINE THEN!” he yelled back, “I don’t care anyways!”
Jeez for being only seven he sure knows how to scream back at my mom! I’d be dead if I tried something like that…
After my mom was done screaming at my little brother she thought it best to leave. They still had to go see Ophelia as well, so I wasn’t going to keep them any longer then need be.
My parents said their good-byes to the kids pretty quickly because Parker kept begging to leave. Seriously that kid needs more than just being grounded…
“Come ON, let’s GO!”
As soon as they left out the door Sam turned to face me with a serious expression plastered across her face. Okay, what’s wrong now?
“Daddy…” she began, “Boys are MEAN! I won’t ever, ever like them! NEVER!”
I chuckled, “That’s my girl! Boys are yucky and mean you don’t ever wanna go near them. The only guy you need in your life is standing right in front of you.”
She nodded, “Yeah you’re not yucky or mean daddy. You’re the best boy, not like Parker!”
I shook my head, “Well your grandparents just need to figure him out… maybe he’s going through a brat phase.”
She rolled her eyes, “I doubt it. He’s just mean!”
“Daddy?” she questioned, “Can I ask you something?”
I stared at her puzzled, “Sure Sam, what about?”
“I know you get sad when anyone talks about mommy but… I was wondering… c-can you show me a picture of her? Please? I always wanted to know what she looked like.”
I sighed, “I… uhm, I g-guess so.”
She frowned, “Oh daddy, please don’t get sad. You don’t have to if you don’t wanna…”
I smiled slightly, “No Sam, it’s alright, I’ll show you a picture if you really wanna see her. I’m sorry I never showed you one before, it’s just hard on daddy to look at anything that reminds me of mommy.”
She smiled back, “It’s okay daddy. I’ll be with you. Want me to bring tissues in case you cry?”
I had to laugh at that one. She’s such a considerate little kid. How did I ever get so lucky to have such an awesome daughter?
“That’s alright sweet pea, I think I’ll be alright.”
Walking down the hall to my room felt like I was walking to my death sentence. Ever since Riley had passed I hadn’t looked at a single picture of her. Anytime I would even think of doing such, I’d break down and cry. It just hurt too much to look at her picture and know she wasn’t here. I had to swallow back my pain though because Sam deserved to see her mom- The mom that would have been there for her. It’s not about whose blood runs through your veins, it’s about who loves and cares for you; that’s what makes a real mother or father.
I crouched down to the bottom drawer and shifted through a bunch of papers and photos I had in there until I came across a picture of Riley. Once I had found it I took it out and placed it on the side table by my bed. Sam stood close to me and slipped her hand into mine. She looked up at me before resting her head against my arm.
“She’s beautiful daddy.”
I nodded my head trying best to hold back tears, “Yeah. So very beautiful.” I looked down at her, “How would you like to go visit her?”
She gleamed up at me, “Really? You really mean it?!”
I smiled, “Yeah, I do. Go help Ryder get dressed and we’ll go for a walk and go visit mommy.”
We got out of the house much later than I really wanted too because Ryder kept giving me a hard time. Samantha wasn’t very happy with him considering she really wanted to go visit Riley.
“Daddy are we almost there?!” Sam questioned, running up beside me.
“There daddy? There?” Ryder added in.
“Yeah we’re almost there, just a little further.”
It took a few minutes but I had finally found Riley’s grave; I hadn’t visited it in about 2 years. My life just got so busy that I hadn’t had a chance to just visit her. Plus I realized after a while that visiting her every day wasn’t doing me any good. I’d stand here for hours crying to a grave when my children were at home needing me. I may not be ready to let Riley go, but slowly I was beginning to let things like this go; Riley would be so mad at me if I was crying to her every day when our kids needed me.
“This is it.” I sighed.
Sam looked up at me, “Daddy is it okay if I get closer?”
I nodded, lowering Ryder to the ground, “You both can go closer.” I put Ryder’s hand in Sam’s, “Take your brother over there; be careful.”
Sam helped Ryder over the stone that surrounded the grave and brought him closer. He looked at Sam and then looked back at me. Telling by the look on his face I can tell he was a bit frightened.
“Daddy?” he whimpered.
“It’s okay Ry; you don’t have to be afraid. You’re just visiting mommy.” I reassured.
Sam looked down at him, “It’s okay little guy.”
Ryder stared at the grave for a bit as if he was trying to figure out if this stone was really his mom. After a few minutes of staring he toddled past Sam and bent down to hug the grave stone.
“Mommy!” he squealed.
Sam sighed, “Ryder, this isn’t really mommy. It’s just a place they put her name to let us know she’s in heaven now.”
Ryder looked at her puzzled, “Mommy angel?”
“Yeah and she’s the prettiest one too!”
I couldn’t hold it back any longer; I just had to cry. The more they talked about Riley the more my heart ached for her. Riley… look what you left behind; two beautiful kids that adore you. Riley I miss you so much; I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over you. You were so perfect in my eyes, how can anyone else compare to you? I want my kids to have two parents and to grow up normally… but I just can’t do it. I know you’d be unhappy with me to give up opportunities to love someone else, but I don’t care… you are my only love and will always be my only love.
“Come on kids, it’s getting late and you have school tomorrow Sam.”
Okay so I may have gotten Sam to eventually sleep in her own room, but it doesn’t mean I don’t like them with me every now and again… Especially after nights like tonight…
Here is a full view of Sam’s room.
Thanks for reading guys! Sorry it took so long to get this out! Also I thought it would be nice to just have a nice calm chapter. I wanted to show the kids and Noah’s relationship. I feel like I’ve been so focused on the storyline that I couldn’t get their father-child relationship in there yet. So I hope you still enjoyed this chapter! Yeah I know that lying about Stacey isn’t the best thing for Sam, but that’s not how Noah sees it. He knows 110% that if Riley was alive she would love Sam like her own and to be honest… she would of too. So in Noah’s eyes he feels that Riley really is her mom. Besides you can’t tell a 5 year old that her mother is a crazy chick who hated her. That would make her feel terrible and ruin the image she holds for her mother.