Author’s Note: I know, I know. It really has been way too long again. I apologize way too much for my lack of updating this blog. I’m sorry about that. ( I just said sorry for being sorry XD I doubled the sorry.) Anyways, I hope the awesome of this chapter makes up for it. Because let me tell you, it’s pretty… interesting. At least, I think so. But yeah, stuff has just been going on in my life and it drove me to not really want to write anything. But, I’m doing a lot better now (I mean A LOT better) and I feel like I’m okay to write this chapter 🙂
Val’s Point Of View
Heart pounding, pulse racing, chest pumping.
The analogies for the way my chest strained could go on forever. What had I just done? WHAT HAD I JUST DONE!? She’s my patient, how could I have just… slept with her? I can go to jail or lose my license to practice! I know I like to do things to bring out the worst in people, but I never wanted to lose everything I worked so hard for. I don’t want to lose the life I had just built for myself. I don’t want to lose… Isa.
I ran up to my front door, stopping suddenly when I saw this weird shaped note on it. I read it, but quickly dismissed it as something that Logan had hung up.
“Every Family Has A Story… Welcome To Ours.”
I breathed heavily, “I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to do.”
I opened the front door slowly, taking small steps inside. I felt so dirty, like I wanted to hide from anyone and anything. I didn’t care for the fact that I cheated on Logan… but I did not want to be caught. I felt like my sins were exposed to the world and that if anyone saw me, they would see what had happened through my expressions.
The steps I took were long and painful. My feet brushed against the carpet, it felt loud; exaggerated.
Keep it together.
Suddenly, a voice was heard. It was muffled and crackled slightly.
“Val? Val are you home already?”
My head snapped down to the chest that rested in our living room. A small monitor sat upon it; I walked towards it quickly.
“Hello?” I answered as if it were a phone.
“Val? Val, if you’re there come upstairs. I have something that I want to show you.”
I glanced at the clock on the wall, it was roughly 10:30 am. Why would she have something to show me in the middle of the day like this? There is no way on earth she knew I would be home. Does she know something? Panic struck my heart.
She has to know.
I climbed the stairs at a pace; thoughts of how she found out scrambling through my mind. I mean, how did she find out?! It couldn’t have happened no more than an hour ago. Did Isa scream for me when I left and they called home? Did she tell them everything and now they’re looking for me?!
Thump, thump, thump.
My heart beat harder and harder each step I climbed. I stopped when I reached the top; bewilderment washing over me. There was a small toy car and a note attached to the side of it resting on the floor. I walked towards it, bending down to pick it up.
“Love Overflows And Joy Never Ends, In A Home That’s Blessed With Family And Friends.”
Another poem? What the heck is she doing?
“Logan?” I questioned, yelling for her, “Logan, where are you?”
“In the bedroom!” She exclaimed.
That’s odd. She seemed so… happy.
I turned the knob to the bedroom door, still clasping onto the note she had left on the ground.
“Logan, what the heck is this poem-“ I stopped midsentence, my throat seizing up at the view in front of me. Oh no. Oh GOD no…
Logan giggled excitedly, “SURPRISE!” her smile widening, “I’m pregnant!”
My eyes widened, “I, uhm, I… what?”
Logan walked over to me, wrapping her arms around my figure.
“We’re going to have a baby, Val.” She gleamed, “I found out the other night, but I wanted to make sure that when I told you it was super special. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting you home right now, so I wasn’t quite finished… but I just winged it. I knew you’d get the gesture once you saw the crib set up.”
I swallowed, “S-so that’s what you wanted to tell me; that you’re pr-pregnant?”
She nodded, “Yeah! I know, I’m kind of freaking out myself… but, once I wrapped my head around it, I started to get super excited! I can’t believe that we’re going to have a little family of our own!”
I backed out of her grip, “I, uh, I… don’t know what to say to this. Are you sure we’re even ready to have a baby? I mean, this is a HUGE responsibility.”
She half smiled, “Well, honestly, who is really ever ready to have a baby? It’s a scary thing, but, it’s also an amazing thing. And I know that you’re going to be an amazing dad. You’re so sweet and caring… and not to mention, smart.” She rubbed the side of my cheek, “We’re going to get through this together, okay?”
“I, uhm, I don’t think I can do this right now.” I gasped, “This is too much to take in! I’m not ready to hear this!”
Logan reached out for me, “Val…”
“No!” I exclaimed, “Don’t touch me! I can’t do this!”
I whipped around to face the door and swung it open. A gust of air blew back some of my hair as I took off out of the bedroom.
No! No! First what happened with Isa, and now I’m going to be a father with some chick I don’t even love?! Plus… I’M GOING TO BE A FATHER! I’m not ready to be a father! I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for something like that. I’m not good enough to be a father; I couldn’t even be good enough to not hurt Isa.
I rushed down the steps at lightning speed; I could hear Logan bawling her eyes out in the bedroom. She must have been too stunned to leave, because she didn’t follow after me. Okay, yes, I actually feel bad because I’m making her cry. But I don’t even know why! I’ve made so many people cry; I thrive on seeing emotion. But right now? I just feel so engulfed by it! I feel like I can’t even br-
I was going so fast down the steps I lost my balance at the bottom. I flew right into the wall and hit my head extremely hard. I quickly picked myself up off the floor and headed for the front door. I didn’t even care that I could barely stand straight, I just wanted out of here!
I turned the knob on the front door, swinging it open. I didn’t even have a chance to walk out of it, because the most stunning view was standing at my doorstep.
“Oh. Wow. Hey.” My father chuckled, “Did you see us or something? Cause, yeah, I didn’t even knock yet.”
I stood there, my mouth agape.
“DAD?” I finally mustered up, “Mom?!”
My mother put her hand on her hip, “Good job Ryder, you scarred the boy. I told you we should have called first…”
I shook my head, trying to take everything in. Okay, I felt like I couldn’t breathe before… now I really can’t.
“What… what are you doing here? I mean, I haven’t seen you since I was like 13. I don’t… I don’t understand. How did you even find me?” I gasped, my heart thumping harder.
“Well, we talked to Tag and he talked to someone else who talked to someone else which lead us to you.” He sighed, “We really need to talk to you about something.”
My mother smacked my dad’s arm, “I thought we weren’t going to say anything yet! What happened to just asking how he was doing??”
“Geez, sorry. You don’t have to get your thong in a bunch.” He laughed, bracing himself for another swat.
I opened my mouth to say something else, but all of a sudden I felt extremely light headed.
“Oh, I don’t feel so good…” I mumbled, taking a forced step backwards.
My father immediately came forward; a look of worry pierced his face. “Val!? Hey, are you alright, kid?”
Before I had the chance to speak, my eyes began to black over and the last thing I remember was my face hitting the carpet.
“SEE! I told you we should have given him a warning! You killed our son! Way to go, stupid.”
“Why are you blaming ME for this!? Maybe he just took one look at your face and got scared. Ever see yourself; gives me nightmares.”
“Yeah, you’re cute. Just make sure he’s okay…”
“Who… who are you?”
Logan’s Point Of View
I feel so terrible, like I was the one to bring this on. I knew Val was going to get freaked out because of the news, but I never thought that it would drive him to the brink of passing out. I feel like such a horrible girlfriend; all I wanted was to have a happy moment with my boyfriend. I feel like we never have those anymore, so I thought this would… bring us closer together.
But anyways, I learned that the people trying to revive my boyfriend were Val’s parents; Ryder and Kara. They wanted to stay here for some time because they miss their son and want to talk to him about some important matters. So after helping them get Val on the couch, I helped them into a spare bedroom. They really didn’t waste anytime stripping into Pjs and taking control like it was their home, too.
I stroked his hair, placing gentle kisses on his forehead.
“So, Logan…” Ryder interrupted my thoughts, “How long have you and Val been together?”
I let out a breath of air, “Oh, wow, it’s been years. We met back in college and we’ve been together ever since. I’d have to say at least 9 years by now.”
“Holy cow, that’s a long time.” Ryder laughed, “Val, is what? 27? 28? Sorry, I know that sounds bad to ask, but I haven’t seen the boy in a long time.”
I smiled, “That’s alright, I don’t mind answering questions for you guys. Uh, yeah, Val is 27 and I turn 27 in about a month. We’re really close in age.”
“Alright, awesome. So, uh, what do you do for a living, Logan? It’s Logan, right?” He rubbed the back of his neck, “I’ve never been so great with names.”
Kara smirked, “You’ve never been so good at anything. But I love you nonetheless.”
“Hey, hey, hey! I’m plenty good at a lot of stuff, I just, uhm, choose not to talk about it anymore. My past is my past.” Ryder looked back over at me, “Sorry, my wife is getting old and batty, she likes to interrupt people. What do you do for a living?”
Before I answered I watched as Kara mouthed something to Ryder and shot daggers at him with her eyes. Wow, these two sure have a weird way of showing love.
“I’m a Vet. I love animals to bits, always have. Although, Val won’t really let us get any; he says they’re just a pain in the butt.”
Kara shook her head, “Yeah, kind of like Val. You know he used to give his Grandpa nothing but grief? He was a little terror when he was a kid; constantly running off and finding himself in some kind of mess.”
I rubbed his head and smiled, “That’s alright, I love him for just being him.”
Kara and Ryder glanced at each other and then back over at me smiling. Okay, that was weird…
“I’m glad our son has someone like you in his life, Logan.” Kara mustered up, “You’re a really nice girl.”
Suddenly, in the midst of our conversation, Val stirred in his sleep-like state. He hoisted himself off of me, rubbing his eyes and groaning.
“Wha happened?” he slurred, “Where am I?”
“You’re home, sweetie. You fainted so we put you on the couch to rest; you’ve been out for about three hours. How are you feeling?” I said lightly, fixing a piece of hair that was covering his eye.
“I feel like someone smacked me upside the head a few hundred times.” He moaned, rubbing the side of his face.
“Well…” Kara spoke, “You kind of did, hit your head, Hun. We don’t know how, but you have a huge bump on the side of your forehead. Are you alright?”
Val swallowed, “Uhm, ye-yes. I’m okay.” He looked at me and then back at Kara, “Mom? You mean, you guys really are here? I thought I just had this really weird dream.”
She smirked, “No, not a dream. We’re really here, kiddo. We’ve missed you so much.”
He rubbed the back of his neck, “I don’t understand… why now? Why so out-of-the-blue, do you decide to just show up?”
Ryder came over, stood in front of Val and then pulled him up to his feet. He placed a hand on his shoulder and looked him straight in the eyes.
“Val, we haven’t been the best parents to you and I understand why you would have questions. But, me and your mother have our reasons for not being around all your life. You just have to trust us with that and understand what we did was to protect you and your siblings. We love you guys to death, but we also love you enough to stay away for your safety.” He sighed, “We know we should have come around sooner, but, we’re here now… and we plan on being more in your life.”
“Is… is that what you wanted to talk to me about?” Val questioned.
He shook his head, “No. No, it’s not. But, we’ll just forget about that for right now. Your mom is right, we just want to be around to see how you’re doing and to catch up on missed time. We’ll talk about that matter later, alright?”
Val looked at me and then at his dad. “Yeah. Yeah, okay, Dad. Of course.”
Ryder pulled his son into a hug; wrapping his arms tight around Val’s body.
“I love yah, kid.” he smiled.
Val squeezed tighter, “I love you too, Dad. I love you too…”
It was an amazing experience to watch as Val was reconnected with his family. Sure, I had known that he hadn’t seen his parents in years, but other than that, he never really talked a lot about them. I knew he loved them and I knew he missed them, but I could see this pain anytime they were mentioned. So, to spare his feelings, I tried my hardest to not bring them up.
I felt happy for Val, but… I still have this pain in the back of heart from what happened before he knocked out. I felt like it was my fault he reacted the way he did, but… after thinking about it more, I feel like there is something he’s not telling me; something that he’s keeping from me. I don’t understand why he’d act so freaked out when we’ve actually TALKED about having kids before. He said he was afraid to have them, but he always seemed happy at the thought. So why would he act so strange… if he was okay with children?
Val was standing outside on the deck, getting some air, when I approached him from behind.
“Val?” I questioned, knots forming in the pit of my stomach, “Hey, can I talk to you?”
He turned around, smiling, “Sure. What’s up?”
It’s like he doesn’t even remember that I told him I was pregnant…
“Val, what happened earlier?” I looked off to the side and then met his gaze, “At first I thought it was something that I did, then I realized… it couldn’t have been. So what is it? Are you happy that I’m going to have a baby or not? I don’t want to be caught in the middle of the emotions.”
Val sighed, “Logan, I’m sorry about what happened this morning. I was under stress and I wasn’t thinking straight. I know what I did wasn’t the reaction you were expecting, but, I’m okay now. Really.”
I looked at him, just staring, trying to read his facial expressions. I couldn’t tell if what he was saying was the truth or not.
Val saw the confusing expression I was holding and walked towards me.
“Come here.”He gripped me tight, “It’s all going to be okay. I promise that I’m happy about this baby and I’m sorry for how I acted. You have nothing to worry about.”
I hugged him back, resting my chin on his shoulder. “Okay, I believe you.”
But a huge part of me knew that something wasn’t right…
Val’s Point Of View
With everything going on in my life, I decided to take some time off for myself. I had never taken a vacation in all the years I’ve been working here, so I made the decision that a three-week vacation was mandatory. I wanted to prove to Logan that I was cool with the pregnancy and I wanted to spend time with my mom and dad. Sure, I was still freaking out about being a dad on the inside, but I couldn’t show her that. No, if I wanted to continue on with this charade I had to prove to her that everything was alright. I could tell she was starting to figure me out. I hate it when I have those moments of exposure; people to start to get inside my head and then I’m done. No, I need to keep myself calm, cool and collected.
So, since I was out for all that time, I had Nathaniel take over for me. He’s honestly the only one that I trust with Isa. He’ll keep up with her without much question and if anything happens to come up, I know that I can talk some sense into him before he’d turn me in. We might not have an amazing relationship, but we’re civil to one another – which I’m glad to have now.
“Hey, Val. I’m really glad you’re back. No one has been really able to do anything with Isa.”
I looked at him confused, “What do you mean?”
Of course I knew what he meant, but I was just trying to make small talk. Isa just doesn’t let anyone talk to her or touch her. But I knew Nathaniel was too stubborn to give her over to another substitute doctor – which really made him the perfect candidate.
“She refuses to speak to people unless they’re you. I don’t know what happened to you, but you need to get in there and start a session.” He shook his head, “She’s driven herself to the point of getting sick. She’s been throwing up, not eating, and running fevers. We’ve tried to have nurses come in there and do tests, but she refuses. So, since you’re back, we’re going to try again to do some tests. Hopefully you being there will help with that.”
Okay, now I really was confused. Did she really miss me that much that she was starting to get sick? I should have never left her… I’m so stupid! I couldn’t show Nathaniel I thought that though, I needed to be subtle.
“Oh, what did you do? Sneeze on her pancakes? I told you to get that snot checked out; you’re pretty deadly.”
Nathaniel rolled his eyes, “Seriously? Do the jokes ever end with you?”
“I don’t know, Natty. Do they?”
He shot me a glare, “Just, get your butt in there and talk to her. A nurse will be around in like 10 minutes or so; try not to hurt yourself. Alright?”
“If I do, will you kiss my boo boo?” I chuckled.
“Yeah, no.” He turned to walk away, “Have fun.”
Dodged a bullet…
After I knew Nathaniel was gone, my whole demeanor dropped. It’s a lot harder to keep up a façade when you’re in pain. I walked towards Isa’s room, taking a deep breath before walking through her door. When I was inside, I was met with a view of her hurt. She was laying on her bed; her knees close to her chest in a protective manner. She was afraid and…
Crying. She was crying. It has been three weeks since everything had happened and yet she was hurting just as much as when I left her. She never told on me, never screamed for me… she just cried. She wanted to hide herself away because of what I did to her. I caused her so much pain and I can NEVER take it back.
I pulled up a chair and placed it by her side. I sat down and just let out a long sigh.
“Isa… it’s me, sweet heart. I’m back from being away.” I rubbed her head a little, “I’m so sorry for what I did.”
Her eyes shot open and she stared at me in shock; as if seeing me was the most surprising factor on the planet. It’s like she expected me to never come back.
She shot upright, swatting my hand away.
“No! Don’t touch me, I did wrong. I did wrong to you and that’s why you ran away. I’m a bad person and I made you get hurt.”
My stomach turned over in knots, “Isa, no. That’s not the truth, you didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who did something wrong, I should have never let that go any further than I did. It was wrong of me to let it happen.” I reached out for her, but she just moved before I touched her.
“I’m wrong, I’m bad, I’m no good.”
She stood up, trying to get even further away from me. She clenched her stomach and let out a loud groan.
“Because of what I did, I have to be sick all the time now. I’m not allowed to be normal, ever. I have to be hot and throw up and not be able to eat. I have to die because of what I did.”
“Isa!” I shouted, “Don’t talk that way! You’re not in the wrong, you did nothing to be sorry for! You don’t deserve to die, you deserve to live on for a very long time. You’re a beautiful, smart and very sweet girl. You’re-“
In the midst of my speech, Isa lost her lunch. She clenched over and emptied her stomach all over the floor.
“It never stops!” She screeched, “IT NEVER STOPS!”
“Isa it’s going to be okay you’re just-“
And that’s when it hit me like a brick to the face; everything was just so clear. I’ve been seeing this same scene for the past three weeks. Isa’s not sick… she’s… she’s…
My thoughts were interrupted as there was a knock at the door.
“Dr. Terrey? I’m here to run the tests on Isa. Can I come in?”
What am I going to do?
So that’s the chapter! Lots of surprises all around in this one. Tell me what you think.